I shared a very personal story on Instagram last week about finding partnership in my life post divorce. I spent a long time sitting with what I wrote before posting. Mainly because I wanted to make sure I knew where I was coming from - Ego vs Soul. Was I trying to IMPRESS (Ego) or to EXPRESS (Soul)?
I like to take my own pulse this way any time I’m making a big decision.
After I wrote the rough draft of my story, I flashed back to something my meditation teacher told me many years ago. She went to great lengths to travel to India to meet her guru at the beginning of her spiritual journey. She said it’s important to meet our teachers because they are examples of what’s possible for us.
I realized that was my motivation in sharing my story - I wanted to offer up a demonstration of what the other side of codependency can look like and what it means to milk a teeny, tiny sliver of willingness into a rekindled faith in love (after coming to the bitter edge of giving up on it altogether).
I thought about writers like Elizabeth Lesser and Jeanette Winterson and Cheryl Strayed whose stories have deeply impacted my life. I thought about how these women’s biographies walked me across major intersections in my life and how different my own story would have been without the example of theirs.
This is where the Ego sits up, sniffing out a chance to be important, wanting to be read and adored and approved of. But the Soul has a different motivation when it sets out to speak and be heard. The Soul understands there is no hierarchy here, of one who knows and one who is learning. Just a windy path with many pilgrims on it; all of us finding our way in our time, with our own kind of magic.
We are all teachers and students of one another and of life.
My story matters and so does yours. I hope you’ll take the time to share, in whatever creative form that story chooses to be expressed. The best way we can honor ourselves is to be mouthpieces of our Souls. To figure out what we’re here to share and then devote ourselves to bringing it forth, into this world.
Before you incarnated, the canvas was blank. Waiting for your shape, your color. Now you’re here and you get to fill that space with your spirit, your light, your song, your story. Don’t forget, in the daily grind of it all, what a miracle you are and how much your contribution matters to the greater whole.
Till next time beauties :)